I met Fifi at a writing job last week. She is one of those Covenant 'my daddy said' girls which is expected given that Fifi is a teenager. Yes..just like I am a teenager.
Fifi punctuates most of her sentences with 'yea'. "These dresses are pretty, yea" or "Aunty is coming over, yea". It wasn't long before I caught the 'iyeyeyea' fever so next time you see me, expect my new punctuations, yea?
Three nights ago, Fifi and I boarded the same taxi.
While the car moved, she hit me with gist upon gist. Phoneh (short for phonetics) was just flying everywhere from her mouth.
Kai! The girl speaks well. Her ability to speak makes mockery of my teenage years.
No doubt, I used to try small back then but this girl is something else.
I had to up my phoneh game because as the only true aspiring female wobelite, I always have to represent. See me supri-ing supri -ing along.
The Taxi driver had been quiet on the journey except at the beginning of the ride when he asked "Where huna dey go?" in a deep accent that screamed, "Hey, I am from Ibadan! "
One of Pasuma Wonder's track was playing.
As the phoneh tempo in the car increased, the music tempo in the taxi increased. From Pasuma to Adekunle Gold to Small doctor and finally we were jamming to Olamide's 'who you epp? '.
Shit just got real. Yea?
Oga driver decided that he won't be left out as a guy man.
He brought the car to a sudden halt and started it again.
The attention these sudden actions would bring cannot be compared.
"Aron know what I do with this car. E just be doing like this since. Babes, please don't get angry, yo? I will take yo to yo destinason"
I knew we were in for an ear damaging session.
Oga driver refused to stop. He took over from Fifi and gave us gist. Wait, did I say gist? Bomb is the word there. Kindly replace it.
He talked about his girlfriend, him being a student at the University of Lagos (I don't remember the department now) how he went clubbing some days back, all in his own kind of phoneh punctuated with yo? 😢
He was obviously trying to impress.
I think I slept off because the next time I heard his voice, we were joining a bus going into the mainland. My ears could not handle that kind of stress.
Till now, I don't know how Fifi survived but
she looked really sad throughout the next ride.
The next time she talked, her accent was that the everyday Naija child.
No more iyeyeyea. No more phoneh. 😂
Isn't the Lord wonderful?
#LagosNaWa
#JayTeeSays
Fifi punctuates most of her sentences with 'yea'. "These dresses are pretty, yea" or "Aunty is coming over, yea". It wasn't long before I caught the 'iyeyeyea' fever so next time you see me, expect my new punctuations, yea?
Three nights ago, Fifi and I boarded the same taxi.
While the car moved, she hit me with gist upon gist. Phoneh (short for phonetics) was just flying everywhere from her mouth.
Kai! The girl speaks well. Her ability to speak makes mockery of my teenage years.
No doubt, I used to try small back then but this girl is something else.
I had to up my phoneh game because as the only true aspiring female wobelite, I always have to represent. See me supri-ing supri -ing along.
The Taxi driver had been quiet on the journey except at the beginning of the ride when he asked "Where huna dey go?" in a deep accent that screamed, "Hey, I am from Ibadan! "
One of Pasuma Wonder's track was playing.
As the phoneh tempo in the car increased, the music tempo in the taxi increased. From Pasuma to Adekunle Gold to Small doctor and finally we were jamming to Olamide's 'who you epp? '.
Shit just got real. Yea?
Oga driver decided that he won't be left out as a guy man.
He brought the car to a sudden halt and started it again.
The attention these sudden actions would bring cannot be compared.
"Aron know what I do with this car. E just be doing like this since. Babes, please don't get angry, yo? I will take yo to yo destinason"
I knew we were in for an ear damaging session.
Oga driver refused to stop. He took over from Fifi and gave us gist. Wait, did I say gist? Bomb is the word there. Kindly replace it.
He talked about his girlfriend, him being a student at the University of Lagos (I don't remember the department now) how he went clubbing some days back, all in his own kind of phoneh punctuated with yo? 😢
He was obviously trying to impress.
I think I slept off because the next time I heard his voice, we were joining a bus going into the mainland. My ears could not handle that kind of stress.
Till now, I don't know how Fifi survived but
she looked really sad throughout the next ride.
The next time she talked, her accent was that the everyday Naija child.
No more iyeyeyea. No more phoneh. 😂
Isn't the Lord wonderful?
#LagosNaWa
#JayTeeSays
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